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Gosh, what a life, isn’t it? This year seems like a blur, but who am I kidding.. That seems to be every year now. This last year was a year of trials, that I’m still trying to make sense of and learn from. Funny how that works. In 10 years, I will look back and think, “Oh, wow. God was really trying to prepare me for this.” As for now, I’m still an empty book, waiting to be completed. However, just because not everything hasn’t been written in ink doesn’t mean that I’ve got nothing to learn.
The one thing that stands out to me more than anything this year isn’t how I graduated college or how I faced some of my biggest trials, but a moment in time where everything just “made sense.” It was obviously one of those many days that God only knows how I was feeling. The math students hadn’t learned the subject fully, my cheer team was facing trials, I didn’t want to go home to a house that replicated my feelings, and I most certainly didn’t want to do anything because I was facing battles within myself. The overload was heavy. I was breaking.
**Side note- This year, I have learned a lot of lessons throughout my drives to and from work. That’s when I really reflect on my life and the life around me.
On my way home from teaching, with all of the feelings buried inside and a mind restlessly trying to fight through them, I had a new feeling dawn upon me. It felt warm, light, and real. Almost movie-like or scripture-like. A thought bursted into my head. It told me, “All that matters in life is to love.” Instantly, I saw the love of my family. I saw the love of the drivers that respectfully drove with me home. I saw the love that I had in the day that had almost passed. I felt so much love, I could explode. In that moment in time, I learned the biggest lesson that, to this day, carries with me.
Don’t sweat the small stuff, or even the big stuff. Love one another and carry on.
In life, we get so caught up with this and that, and here and there, that we forget. We lose sight of the most powerful force in the Universe. Love. It’s everywhere you go, but something not keen to the eye, is easily forgotten. But really. Think about it. How did you come to this Earth? Love. How did the world’s greatest inventions come to be? Love. It all comes down to love. It’s the binding force between what is and what needs to be. With a force that strong, so evident… Couldn’t it possibly be a greater purpose of why we were intended to be on this planet?
That one moment in time, I experienced what I call “my revelation of the year,” because in that moment, I was overwhelmed with an inspiration that my life would be hard and would get harder (indeed it has), but all I had to do was love to overcome and fulfill my true purpose. Obviously, trying to love when it seems a world is crashing down on you, is a challenge in itself, but one thing I do know, it works. Love overcomes it all.
Whenever I lose sight of it, I live back to that one moment and feed off of it, and I think that is important for all of us to have. We all have our flaws, imperfections, and moments that I seriously think we are possessed by demons… Haha. BUT, if we could feed off these moments of love, I think we could really change the way we live our lives and others around us live.
Looking back to 2018, I would say the struggle was so real, but I’m grateful for the lessons, especially this one.
Crazy how one moment in time can change everything you know to be.